NEED TO KNOW
- A Reddit user is wondering if she’s in the wrong for asking her mother to pick a color other than “winter white” to wear to her wedding
- Though the bride-to-be reminded her mom that it’s “considered rude” to wear white to a wedding, the mother said she must have some “insecurity issues” if the color of her outfit mattered so much to her
- Her dad says she is being “dramatic” and the mom threated to skip her big day
A bride-to-be is fighting with her mother after she revealed she was planning to wear white to her wedding.
On Reddit’s r/AmIOverreacting forum, the 27-year-old woman explains that she is gearing up for her “small garden wedding” in November, which has a “semi-formal” dress code.
While at her final dress fitting, her mom “casually mentioned” that she’d already picked out her outfit for the big day.
“I asked what color it was and she said, ‘It’s white, but it’s more of a winter white. Don’t worry, I won’t upstage you,'” the user writes.
The woman immediately pointed out that wearing white to someone else’s wedding is a faux pas and not something she should do.
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“I kind of blinked at her and asked, ‘Wait, you’re wearing white to my wedding?'” the Reddit user continues. “She said yes, and that she ‘looks best in white’ and it’s ‘not like anyone would confuse her for the bride.’ ”
The poster pleaded with her mother to choose any other color, though she was met with resistance. Her mother claimed she was being “controlling and ‘making everything about me.’ ”
“I told her weddings usually are about the couple and it’s generally considered rude to wear white unless it’s been approved,” she continues. “She scoffed and said I ‘clearly have some insecurity issues if a dress threatens me.’ ”
The Reddit user then told her mom that, if wearing white was a hill she’s willing to die on, she might as well just skip the wedding altogether.
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“I told her she was welcome not to come if the color of her outfit mattered more than my comfort on the biggest day of my life,” she writes. “Now my dad is calling me dramatic and my mom is threatening not to come. My aunt (her sister) agrees with me, but says I should just let it go ‘for peace.’ ”
Though the bride wonders if she’s overreacting, others in the comments suggested she stand her ground, pointing out that this isn’t a typical response from a mother.
“Wearing white when you have made it very clear that do NOT want her to do so is just rude. This is some underlying need to compete with you or unnerve you in some way at your wedding,” one commenter wrote.
“Your mother is welcome to skip the event if she can’t find any other color that suits her, and Dad can stay home with her,” another added. “And I abhor people who tell you that you should go against your wishes to keep peace, like why can’t the offending person do what is being asked ya know for the peace?”
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